Tongue Tied: The Small Thing That Steers Your Whole Life

When I first started following Jesus, I was taught a firm rule: Christians don't swear. But we found loopholes. Son of a biscuit. Cheese and crackers. Fudsicles. Good gravy. My personal favorite growing up, crud. As if God leaned in and said, "Oh, I thought you said the real thing. Okay, you're fine." It's funny, but it also misses the point entirely. As I've walked with Jesus, I've realized following him isn't about a list of words we don't say. It's about learning his way of speaking.

That's exactly what James is after in chapter 3. He throws three pictures at us. A tiny bit in a horse's mouth turns a two-thousand-pound animal. A small rudder, about one percent of a ship, steers a vessel the size of a floating town. And a single spark can burn a whole forest. Small object, enormous impact. Then he lands it: the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts.

Proverbs says life and death are in the power of the tongue, and I don't think that's exaggeration. In 1969, insults traded during a World Cup qualifier between Honduras and El Salvador spiraled into an actual war. In the 1960s, Dr. King said "I have a dream" and empowered a movement. Words start wars and heal marriages. I know this personally. In high school, my English teacher read a mediocre essay of mine and said, "Corey, I think you have a gift." That one sentence made me a writer for life.

James doesn't hand out seven easy steps here, so here's what I've been practicing. Before I speak, I ask three questions. Does this need to be said? Does it need to be said by me? Does it need to be said by me right now? And on the positive side, like that John Mayer song, say what you need to say. Life is short. If you need to say I love you, I believe in you, or I forgive you, say it now.

That's what Jesus did. He always spoke for the benefit of others, even when it was hard. My friend Peter, known online as Foster Dad Flipper, grew up poor on the streets of Uganda until a stranger asked his name and said, "I believe there's something better for you." Peter has since fostered over forty kids. One eleven-year-old boy he took in looked at him and asked, "Can I call you dad? I choose you." That is heaven on earth.

So loved ones, let's speak life. Let's speak Jesus.

We'd love to have you join us. Garden City Church meets every Sunday at 10:00 AM in Tacoma, right across from Wright Park. Come as you are, whether you've walked with Jesus for years or you're just curious and checking things out. This is a place you can belong before you believe. Find us at gardencitynw.com for directions and what to expect.

How to be lifted by God

James chapter 4 reads like a loving parent pointing a finger. "What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?" The first time I really sat with those verses, I felt a little chastised. But James isn't just tearing us down. He's doing what a good parent does, correcting us because he loves us. Safe hands, remember? Our hands aren't for pushing and shoving.

I know that battle personally. For three and a half years, my husband Corey and I waited for a child, and I wanted it so badly I was willing to do whatever it took. Trying turned into a year, then another, then doctor visits and disappointment. Meanwhile it felt like every woman in my small group was having baby after baby, shower after shower. My rose-colored glasses went foggy, then tunneled, until getting pregnant was all I could see. Envy took root in me and branched into everything, my marriage, my joy, even my relationship with God. On the outside I smiled and faked excitement. Inside, I was full of resentment.

It reminded me of a Flannery O'Connor story called Revelation, about a proud, self-righteous woman named Mrs. Turpin who silently judges and ranks everyone around her. A girl named Mary Grace finally snaps, throws a book at her, and calls her an ugly warthog from hell. It takes literally being hit in the head by grace for Mrs. Turpin to see herself clearly. And I had to ask: am I becoming that woman? Was I letting envy and selfish ambition turn me into someone I had no right to be?

That's what James means by friendship with the world. It isn't caring about trendy nail polish (cabana boy blue, if you're wondering). It's harboring bitter envy and selfish ambition, doing whatever it takes to grab what we think is rightfully ours. And it puts us at odds with God.

But James doesn't leave us there. He hands us the way out: submit to God, come near to him, wash your hands, purify your hearts, humble yourself. Surrender. When I finally set my envy down and sought God's wisdom, it led me to a doctor, a diagnosis of endometriosis, surgery, and healing. And God's plan turned out bigger than mine. I didn't have one baby. I had twins.

So go out, humble yourself, and surrender to God. When you get down on your knees, he lifts you to your feet. Don't let grace be thrown in your face. Choose to get higher, and he will lift you up.

We'd love to have you join us. Garden City Church meets every Sunday at 10:00 AM in Tacoma. Come as you are, whether you've walked with Jesus for years or you're just curious and checking things out. This is a place you can belong before you believe. Find us at gardencitynw.com for directions and what to expect.

- Jennifer

The Overflowing Love of the Father: What "Be Perfect" Really Means

Years ago, a kid in my youth group named Zack called me on the last day of school in a panic. I'd agreed to sign off on his senior project, a website for our youth group, and after a whole year of "almost done," he needed my signature in fifteen minutes or he wouldn't graduate. So I drove to my old high school, and on the way I may have slipped his geometry teacher a note to read aloud: "Zack, your brother's here. He brought your underwear. He says everything's going to be okay." The class roared. Zack went bright red and blurted, "I don't have a brother!" Then I tapped on the window. That day, I was his brother.

Here's what you wouldn't know about Zack just by looking at him. He wore a McDonald's manager shirt by senior year because he worked nearly every day to help his single mom pay the bills. He was working to help his sister and mom survive. Suddenly his unfinished project made a lot more sense. When you understand someone's story, you stop judging how they carry it and start caring.

This week we looked at one of the most misread verses in the Bible: "Be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect." We hear "perfect" and think flawless, mistake-free, anxious to measure up. But the Greek word is telios, and it means whole or complete. It's about your inside matching your outside, your heart and your actions lining up, instead of the divided, whitewashed life Jesus warned the Pharisees about.

And wholeness, it turns out, looks like overflowing love. Jesus said don't just love your neighbor, love your enemy, because the Father sends sun and rain on the good and the evil alike. He keeps stretching us outward in widening circles, from family to friends to strangers to the people we'd rather avoid, always asking for one more step. The golden rule is the key: treat others the way you'd want to be treated. Love is an act of imagination. Picture that person as your own family, and act accordingly.

So this Father's Day, the invitation is twofold. Receive the Father's overflowing love, and then let it overflow out of you to someone who needs it.

We'd love to have you join us. Garden City Church meets every Sunday at 10:00 AM in Tacoma. Come as you are, whether you've walked with Jesus for years or you're just curious and checking things out. This is a place you can belong before you believe. Find us at gardencitynw.com for directions and what to expect.

- Pastor George

Eyes to See: How the Beatitudes Change the Way We View People

Eyes to See: How the Beatitudes Change the Way We View People

This week's message started with a trip to the eye doctor and a pair of Costco sunglasses that turned out to be pink. Nobody warned the color blind guy buying them, so he preached a whole sermon before finding out. It got a good laugh, but it set up a real question. What if our problem isn't our eyes, but the way we see people?

There's a moment in Matthew where two blind men shout for Jesus while a busy crowd pushes past them. The crowd noticed them. Jesus actually saw them. He stopped, asked what they wanted, and healed them out of compassion. That gap between being noticed and being truly seen runs through the whole story. Matthew holds onto that question all the way to the cross. The religious and political leaders, the people who should have recognized God, end up mocking Jesus as he dies. Then a Roman soldier, an outsider with no reason to care, looks up and says, "This was certainly God's Son." The least likely person in the crowd is the one who finally sees clearly.

That's the lens. When you read the Beatitudes through the cross, you start to notice that Jesus was the poor in spirit, the meek, the merciful, the persecuted one. The blessed life often looks broken to the world.

Father Gregory Boyle spent thirty years at Homeboy Industries learning this from former gang members most people had given up on. One of them put it this way after years of hiding his scars: "My wounds are my friends. How can I help heal the wounded if I don't welcome my own?"

So here's something to sit with this week. When you look at the people around you, do you see someone to judge, or someone to love and learn from?

Jesus, would you open our eyes.

We'd love to have you join us. Garden City Church meets every Sunday at 10:00 AM here in Tacoma. Come as you are, whether you've been following Jesus for years or you're just curious and checking things out. This is a place you can belong before you believe. You can find this full sermon on our podcast or YouTube page

- George Bedlion